There And Draft Again

A Fellowship of Fantasy Writers

The Fantasy Novelist’s Exam by David J. Parker December 8, 2012

Welcome Fellow Fantasy Writers!

So I didn’t write this post. This post was first published by David J. Parker (with additional material by Samuel Stoddard) on this website. Since it is awesome, I have decided to share it with you. Visit the RinkWorks Production website for more information.

So here goes…

“Ever since J.R.R. Tolkien and C.S. Lewis created the worlds of Middle Earth and Narnia, it seems like every windbag off the street thinks he can write great, original fantasy, too. The problem is that most of this “great, original fantasy” is actually poor, derivative fantasy. Frankly, we’re sick of it, so we’ve compiled a list of rip-off tip-offs in the form of an exam. We think anybody considering writing a fantasy novel should be required to take this exam first. Answering “yes” to any one question results in failure and means that the prospective novel should be abandoned at once.”

David J. Parker.

The Exam

  1. Does nothing happen in the first fifty pages?
  2. Is your main character a young farmhand with mysterious parentage?
  3. Is your main character the heir to the throne but doesn’t know it?
  4. Is your story about a young character who comes of age, gains great power, and defeats the supreme badguy?
  5. Is your story about a quest for a magical artifact that will save the world?
  6. How about one that will destroy it?
  7. Does your story revolve around an ancient prophecy about “The One” who will save the world and everybody and all the forces of good?
  8. Does your novel contain a character whose sole purpose is to show up at random plot points and dispense information?
  9. Does your novel contain a character that is really a god in disguise?
  10. Is the evil supreme badguy secretly the father of your main character?
  11. Is the king of your world a kindly king duped by an evil magician?
  12. Does “a forgetful wizard” describe any of the characters in your novel?
  13. How about “a powerful but slow and kind-hearted warrior”?
  14. How about “a wise, mystical sage who refuses to give away plot details for his own personal, mysterious reasons”?
  15. Do the female characters in your novel spend a lot of time worrying about how they look, especially when the male main character is around?
  16. Do any of your female characters exist solely to be captured and rescued?
  17. Do any of your female characters exist solely to embody feminist ideals?
  18. Would “a clumsy cooking wench more comfortable with a frying pan than a sword” aptly describe any of your female characters?
  19. Would “a fearless warrioress more comfortable with a sword than a frying pan” aptly describe any of your female characters?
  20. Is any character in your novel best described as “a dour dwarf”?
  21. How about “a half-elf torn between his human and elven heritage”?
  22. Did you make the elves and the dwarves great friends, just to be different?
  23. Does everybody under four feet tall exist solely for comic relief?
  24. Do you think that the only two uses for ships are fishing and piracy?
  25. Do you not know when the hay baler was invented?
  26. Did you draw a map for your novel which includes places named things like “The Blasted Lands” or “The Forest of Fear” or “The Desert of Desolation” or absolutely anything “of Doom”?
  27. Does your novel contain a prologue that is impossible to understand until you’ve read the entire book, if even then?
  28. Is this the first book in a planned trilogy?
  29. How about a quintet or a decalogue?
  30. Is your novel thicker than a New York City phone book?
  31. Did absolutely nothing happen in the previous book you wrote, yet you figure you’re still many sequels away from finishing your “story”?
  32. Are you writing prequels to your as-yet-unfinished series of books?
  33. Is your name Robert Jordan and you lied like a dog to get this far?
  34. Is your novel based on the adventures of your role-playing group?
  35. Does your novel contain characters transported from the real world to a fantasy realm?
  36. Do any of your main characters have apostrophes or dashes in their names?
  37. Do any of your main characters have names longer than three syllables?
  38. Do you see nothing wrong with having two characters from the same small isolated village being named “Tim Umber” and “Belthusalanthalus al’Grinsok”?
  39. Does your novel contain orcs, elves, dwarves, or halflings?
  40. How about “orken” or “dwerrows”?
  41. Do you have a race prefixed by “half-”?
  42. At any point in your novel, do the main characters take a shortcut through ancient dwarven mines?
  43. Do you write your battle scenes by playing them out in your favorite RPG?
  44. Have you done up game statistics for all of your main characters in your favorite RPG?
  45. Are you writing a work-for-hire for Wizards of the Coast?
  46. Do inns in your book exist solely so your main characters can have brawls?
  47. Do you think you know how feudalism worked but really don’t?
  48. Do your characters spend an inordinate amount of time journeying from place to place?
  49. Could one of your main characters tell the other characters something that would really help them in their quest but refuses to do so just so it won’t break the plot?
  50. Do any of the magic users in your novel cast spells easily identifiable as “fireball” or “lightning bolt”?
  51. Do you ever use the term “mana” in your novel?
  52. Do you ever use the term “plate mail” in your novel?
  53. Heaven help you, do you ever use the term “hit points” in your novel?
  54. Do you not realize how much gold actually weighs?
  55. Do you think horses can gallop all day long without rest?
  56. Does anybody in your novel fight for two hours straight in full plate armor, then ride a horse for four hours, then delicately make love to a willing barmaid all in the same day?
  57. Does your main character have a magic axe, hammer, spear, or other weapon that returns to him when he throws it?
  58. Does anybody in your novel ever stab anybody with a scimitar?
  59. Does anybody in your novel stab anybody straight through plate armor?
  60. Do you think swords weigh ten pounds or more? [info]
  61. Does your hero fall in love with an unattainable woman, whom he later attains?
  62. Does a large portion of the humor in your novel consist of puns?
  63. Is your hero able to withstand multiple blows from the fantasy equivalent of a ten pound sledge but is still threatened by a small woman with a dagger?
  64. Do you really think it frequently takes more than one arrow in the chest to kill a man?
  65. Do you not realize it takes hours to make a good stew, making it a poor choice for an “on the road” meal?
  66. Do you have nomadic barbarians living on the tundra and consuming barrels and barrels of mead?
  67. Do you think that “mead” is just a fancy name for “beer”?
  68. Does your story involve a number of different races, each of which has exactly one country, one ruler, and one religion?
  69. Is the best organized and most numerous group of people in your world the thieves’ guild?
  70. Does your main villain punish insignificant mistakes with death?
  71. Is your story about a crack team of warriors that take along a bard who is useless in a fight, though he plays a mean lute?
  72. Is “common” the official language of your world?
  73. Is the countryside in your novel littered with tombs and gravesites filled with ancient magical loot that nobody thought to steal centuries before?
  74. Is your book basically a rip-off of The Lord of the Rings?
  75. Read that question again and answer truthfully.

Hoping you enjoyed!

Feel free to leave a comment below…

Good Luck and Keep Writing!

EM

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Fantasy Subgenres December 5, 2012

Welcome Fellow Fantasy Writers!

So you’ve written a fantasy novel? That’s awesome! But what sort of fantasy novel did you write? Epic? High? Gritty? Arthurian? What exactly is Arthurian anyway? Well, this post is supposed to help! Below is a list of fantasy subgenres and what they are. Find out what sort of fantasy you wrote!

 

Alternate World(Portal): Fantasy occurring in a world parallel to our own. Often a primary piece of world building is, or should be, the portal the main character uses to get to and from our world to the fantasy one. Think C.S. Lewis’ The Chronicles of Narnia or Lewis Carroll’s Through the Looking Glass.

 

Arthurian: Novels set in the time period of King Arthur, often having to deal with either Arthur himself or members of his Court. Think of Thomas Pynchon’s Gravity’s Rainbow or BBC’s Merlin ( which is an awesome show you should watch and this isn’t my minor Colin Morgan obsession).

 

Contemporary: Fantasy set in modern times that in very familiar settings. World building primarily includes the idea that magical creatures are walking among us. Think Neil Gaimen’s novel Neverwhere.

 

Dark: Fantasy subgenre that shares elements of horror or thrillers. It also will typically have a very gothic feel. Think The Black Jewels Series by Anne Bishop.

 

Epic: This genre is as big as the name hints. It deals with the human journey, the creation of philosophy, and it really digs into the human condition. Everything from the main character to the villain to the armies are big. Typically hinges on some sort of world destruction. Think Lord of the Rings by J.R.R Tolkien.

 

Gritty: One of our contributors, EM Castellan, specializes in this, so I asked her what the genre meant to her! She says, “the setting is still imaginary worlds. But instead of relying on complicated magic systems and weird creatures, these stories show us a world in shades of grey, where the characters are as flawed as we are, with the same emotions and reactions. These books touch on concepts which echo in our real world. The trend was started by Glen Cook’s Black Company series in the mid 1980s. Then George R. R. Martin’s A Song of Ice and Fire series followed in the mid 1990s. And in the last ten years, this subgenre has grown exponentially, with authors such as Joe Abercrombie, Scott Lynch, K. J. Parker, Mark Lawrence, Steven Erikson and Brent Weeks.”

 

High: This subgenre of fantasy typically tries to play with the tropes of the genre. It uses Elfs, dwarves, swords, journeys, and magic, but tries to turn those tropes on their heads. Think The Hobbit by J.R.R. Tolkien.

 

Historical: A specific time period in Earth’s history is turned into your personal playground for fantastical elements. Think A Great and Terrible Beauty by Libba Bray or The Princess Bride by William Goldman (also a book worth reading and its definitely not because I know all the words to the movie version…)

 

Urban Fantasy: This is where fantastical elements or creatures are in common, and well known, urban areas such as New York, Chicago, or San Francisco. Think Sanctum by Sarah Fine.

 

So there you have it, a basic break down of most fantasy genres. The genres can, of course, be more nuanced, but these are the primary genres agents and editors see. So, if you think you’ve written a novel in one of these genres, great! I would read some in your genre, revise, send off to beta readers, then write that query!!

Good Luck and Keep Writing!

Jessy 🙂

 

First Post and Book Giveaway ! December 1, 2012

Welcome and thank you for stopping by our blog There And Draft Again: A Fellowship of Fantasy Writers.

Today is our official launch day and we’re hoping you’ll come by often in the future to share our journeys in the realms of fantasy fiction.

If you want to know more about who we are, please see the About Us page. If you’re looking for other Fantasy websites, see these Useful Links. If you would like some advice on which fantasy books to read, check out our Books Recommendations.

Then on this blog, you will find posts related to the following topics:

Writing Fantasy: a challenge of epic proportions. Under this category you’ll find posts about word count, world building, writing tips and online resources for Fantasy writers.

Publishing a Fantasy book: how to avoid an epic fail. Here you’ll find posts about the different publishing routes a Fantasy writer can take (traditional, small press, indie) as well as query and publishing tips.

Industry news: making sense of the fantasy world. These posts will bring you the latest newsabout the stateof the fantasy publishing industry: trends, awards, new acquisitions by big publishers, etc.

Reading epic books: here you’ll findbook reviews as well as a guide to all the sub-genres in fantasy literature.

Epic Inspiration: we will share with you our recommendations for fantasy TV shows, movies and photos that we find aspiring.

Now and before you go, we’d like you to follow our blog via email or WordPress, and if you do, you get a chance to win ONE of the following two books:

A SIGNED copy of Inheritance by Christopher Paolini (YA Epic Fantasy)

Inheritance-Paolini

A SIGNED copy of The Blade Itself by Joe Abercrombie (Adult Gritty Epic Fantasy)

 The Balde Itself - Abercrombie

*Giveaway is now closed*

The giveaway runs from today until Saturday 15th December 2012 at midnight (BST time) and it is international.

To enter please fill in the contact form below with your name and email, and let us know if you follow via email or WordPress. Don’t forget to mention which book you wish to win!

You HAVE TO follow our blog by email or WordPress to enter.

Entrants must be at least 13 years of age.

This giveaway is open Internationally.

The winner will be chosen randomly, notified by email and will have 72 hours to reply or a new winner will be chosen.

We are not responsible for items lost in the mail.

We hold the right to end the giveaway before its original deadline without any prior notice.

We hold the right to disqualify any entry as I see fit.

Privacy information: no information given for this giveaway will be used for other purpose than this giveaway. All information provided (names, emails and mail addresses) will be deleted after the giveaway.

Good luck and feel free to leave us a comment below…